May you always have a shell in your pocket and sand in your shoes
I can’t believe your 5 ! Where has that time gone? Before I know it you will be grown and gone! I can’t bare this thought right now. I have been thinking back over the last few years and how our lives have changed. You have changed mine for the better of course. I know I sometimes get angry and shouty. Especially when I am tired, I also know that the last 2 years have been difficult with the arrival of your little sister and the sleepless nights. I am sorry that I was so distant for a lot of that, please know that I really tried to think of your needs and the quality time you needed from me. I always value our girlie days together and I know that you do too.
Despite the long hard nights and another person being invited into our lives you have adapted to the role of big sister amazingly. Your little sister adores you and the grown up way your share your things with her (most of the time) is wonderful to watch.
You have always been such a sensitive soul, we learnt quickly after you came home, not to hand you over to visitors immediately as it always ended in screams. Instead we found you liked to suss folk out and get used to these people in your space before you let them hold you. We knew then you knew your own mind and that as a highly sensitive little girl you would need us to be in tune with your needs.
This never seemed to be a problem darling. You knew if I was upset and cried if I was angry…sometimes even before I had even realised how I was feeling myself! The day I cried over a phone call I had, had and you sought out the box of tissues then came to wipe my eyes you were only 2 or three…I thought my heart would burst right there, you beautiful angel of mine!
You taught me to be mindful of my emotions and how I was feeling in the here and now. I learnt to hold you close to my heart in these moments, taking deep breaths and slowing my heart rate down which always calmed you.
I loved these moments we shared and the connectedness I felt with you.
Everyone who meets you falls in love with you darling – the staff at Day care (who jumped at the chance to be key workers for your sister after you), You amazed teachers in pre-school with your imagination and creativity. I will never forget Mrs W telling us that it is you who makes up the games for all the kids to play and how she spoke to your reception teacher over the phone to tell her about your art work. They loved that every morning you strolled into Nursery and asked to make a new animal…especially when that animal was a badger out of a Yogurt pot with strips of black paper, all without the use of a picture to guide you! The next day you asked to make it a home.
When I think about your future, I only ever see good and happiness in your life. I can’t wait to meet the adult you will be and see the career you will choose as I am certain that there is a very special reason you are here and that you made such an amazing recovery from the traumatic birth and the days following. Don’t ever waste the precious gift you have my angel.
Your love and compassion for people around you, whoever they are is truly humbling. I never thought that you could get any more beautiful than when you were born. How wrong I was.
Everyday, week, month and year you grow more and more beautiful. They say beauty is only skin deep…but not with you sweetheart. You are beautiful inside and out and I am truly happy that not only I got to meet you, but that I got to be your mummy.
Happy 5th Birthday my Beautiful Princess x
Please read our 3 part post about My Big princess and the day she entered our world